Monday, April 06, 2009 ♡~
Ex Kingfisher is finally over.
but im still very uptight with everything.
everyday been a usual routine for me, life is getting so boring.
but luckily, my bangkok trip is coming soon.
19 Mar 09 - 22 Mar 09.
time to destress and unwind.
retail therapy!!!
been very very down. temper had turned real bad.
but i aint gonna complain much.
even blogging it out, it wont make me feel better, it wont possibly make any impact.
so what for!
thanks to those who have been asking me what happen.
i hasnt said the full story of it to anyone yet.
but to honest, u wont understand it. it's no point.
i really dislike ple's unhelpful reaction, it actually pisses me off.
and at the end of the day, aft saying it again, im annoyed again.
so dun ask me anything ok. i will say if i wanna say.
i juz wan to be left alone.
been out alone very often recently.
i like the feel when the wind caresses my face.
the moon and stars shinely bright upon me.
for a moment, i felt that this world is beautiful and God is awesome.
But when i back to that place, i feel that this world is so unfair, ugliness of mankind reflected clearly.
God is unjust. why do i have to go thru these over and over again?
was asked by mum, aint im afraid of the situation in BKK?
Answered firmly, "NO".
if im destined to die, i can just die anytime now.
being knocked down while crossing the road.
falling down the stairs.
it is not the death that is scarily. it is about living in this scarily world.
being died, we are free from everything in this world, lost conscious to this world.
but living, we need all the courage to go thru all the obstacles and crisis.
and for me, my ratio of gd times vs bad times = 1:20
we gt to face all the nonsense and struggle to settle them, to continue to struggle for our survival.
it is just like now, im drowning in the water.
water covered 2/3 of my face and im struggling to float.
but yet, i know i will die eventually.
so why continue to struggle? just let me continue drowning to death.
it is better than being rescue and fallen into coma and having to go thru all the pains and yet you have to face death again.
Royal Writes の
10:20 AM
